In a world defined by technological convenience, Stanford psychiatrist Anna Lembke warns that our tolerance for effort is diminishing. Activities that require strain, such as working out or learning new skills, increasingly feel like chores. However, Lembke argues that we can retrain our brains to engage with—and even enjoy—these challenges by adopting specific behavioral strategies.
Create a Granular Plan
The primary barrier to doing hard things is making the decision in the moment. When faced with a choice between effort and comfort, the brain usually chooses comfort. To combat this, Lembke advises making a detailed, intentional plan in advance. By deciding exactly when and how you will tackle a task the day before—such as laying out gym clothes or scheduling a specific study time—you project yourself into the future to achieve long-term desires rather than succumbing to short-term impulses.
Leverage Social Accountability
Willpower is strengthened by community. Research suggests that individuals are more likely to succeed when partnered with others on a similar path. Whether it is a workout buddy or a study group, connecting socialization to your goals makes difficult tasks easier. Financial psychologist Charles Chaffin agrees, noting that shared challenges create a system of mutual encouragement and policing that significantly increases success rates.
The Dopamine Balance Scale
Lembke uses the metaphor of a balance scale to explain the neurochemistry of motivation. While hard tasks initially tip the scale toward "pain," enduring this discomfort leads to a longer-lasting boost of dopamine. In contrast, immediate gratifications like social media offer only fleeting pleasure. Understanding that the initial struggle is the price of sustained satisfaction is key to building resilience.
Embrace Imperfection
Finally, the article emphasizes the importance of self-compassion. Strict adherence to perfection often leads to shame and abandonment of goals when slip-ups occur. Lembke suggests aiming for moderation and recognizing that imperfect progress—such as eating more whole foods even if you didn’t cut sugar entirely—is still a victory.
Mentoring question
What is one specific ‘hard’ task you have been avoiding, and exactly what preparations can you make tonight to ensure you execute it tomorrow without hesitation?