Four Daily Phrases to Foster Motivated and Confident Teens

The Core Message

This video offers parents a communication strategy to raise motivated, confident, and resilient teenagers. The central theme is to shift from saying what you feel like saying, especially during moments of frustration, to saying what your teen needs to hear to feel understood and secure.

Key Phrases for Daily Communication

The speaker outlines four simple but powerful phrases to use every day to build a stronger relationship and foster a teen’s self-confidence:

  • “Go for it.” Instead of sheltering your teen, encourage them to take on safe, ethical challenges. This helps them build perseverance and prepares them for the realities of adulthood. It shows you believe in their capabilities.
  • “I’m here for you.” As teens seek more independence, this phrase respects their autonomy. It allows them to make their own choices while knowing they have a supportive safety net if they need it, without feeling controlled.
  • “How did you do that?” When your teen demonstrates knowledge or a skill you don’t have (like with technology or a hobby), asking this shows genuine interest and respect. It validates their expertise and keeps communication channels open.
  • “I love you.” This essential phrase reminds your teen of your unconditional love and acceptance, which is vital for their self-worth. Many teens feel their parents’ love is tied to their performance, so frequent, explicit reminders of your love are crucial.

Conclusion and Takeaway

The main takeaway is that intentional, positive communication is fundamental to a teen’s development. By consistently using these phrases, parents can build a foundation of security and self-confidence in their children, leading to long-term success and a healthy parent-teen bond.


Mentoring Question

Reflecting on your interactions, which of these four phrases do you use the least, and how could you start incorporating it into your daily conversations with your teen?

Source: https://youtube.com/watch?v=08j_UAWXn_M&si=6WveaYR_e0AYlk21

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