A significant 60% of new managers fail early in their roles due to a critical mistake: they believe talking *at* their employees will earn respect, but it actually has the opposite effect. This summary outlines a five-step system designed to build genuine, lasting respect and authority from day one by shifting a manager’s approach from demanding compliance to inspiring commitment.
1. Set the Standard by Leading by Example
Your team will mirror your actions, not just your words. To build a foundation of respect, you must first hold yourself to the standards you expect from others. Key actions include being consistently early, taking on difficult tasks to lead from the front without micromanaging, and remaining calm and professional under pressure. When you model the behavior you want to see, respect follows naturally.
2. Create Buy-In Through Conversation
Avoid the common trap of “info-dumping” instructions, which causes employees to tune out. Instead, turn directives into conversations, because people are more likely to support what they help create. Instead of stating a goal, ask, “What do we need to do to hit this deadline?” Solicit their opinions on changes and actively listen by repeating their concerns to show they’ve been understood. This collaborative approach turns resistance into buy-in.
3. Build a Culture of Self-Policing Accountability
Inconsistent enforcement of rules weakens your team’s entire structure, much like pulling the wrong block in a game of Jenga. To create a team that holds itself accountable, you must be unwavering in your standards. Enforce rules consistently with no favoritism, make consequences for rule-breaking automatic and immediate, and shift ownership by asking your team *how* and *when* they will complete tasks, rather than constantly reminding them.
4. Own Your Mistakes to Build Credibility
How you handle your own failures is a critical moment for building respect. Hiding or blaming others destroys trust, while owning your mistakes builds it. When you make an error, follow the “Three A’s”: **Acknowledge** the mistake upfront (“That’s on me”), offer a professional **Apology** (“I should have handled that better”), and state the **Action** you’ll take to prevent it from happening again.
5. Genuinely Care About Your People
The deepest level of respect is reserved for leaders who genuinely care about their team as individuals, not just as employees. The goal is to find the balance between being a supportive leader and an effective boss. Get to know your team beyond their work roles, recognize and appreciate their efforts (both small and large), and be firm but fair when holding them to high standards, framing feedback as a tool to help them succeed.
Mentoring question
Reflecting on these five steps, which area presents the biggest challenge to your current leadership style, and what is one specific action you can take this week to practice and improve on it?
Source: https://youtube.com/watch?v=yUHA3l1ejYE&si=UK69MzBUlaFKX0Pa
Leave a Reply